Sexy sexy attitude
I looked in the mirror naked yesterday, in between taking a shower and putting some clothes on, and I thought, “You look like you have a lot of personality.”
I know. That’s an insult, right?
“What’s she like?”
“Um, she has a good personality.”
“Ohhh….I see.”
How long has THAT been around? Is it officially forever yet?
When I wrote stories as a little girl and a teenager, I almost always had three different types of women/girl characters. The protagonist, who was the most like me, a little awkward, usually, but promising, and always worrying about something. The friend, who was gentle and sweet and didn’t have a ton of opinions, but was often enthusiastic and supportive. And the kickass woman warrior goddess queen mage adventurer who did whatever she wanted. Y’know, your three basic characters.
I was always in love with the last one. Sometimes she was stunningly gorgeous, sometimes she wasn’t. Sometimes she had a mysterious scar from a mysterious battle. She carried a dagger and knew how to use it. Sometimes she was silent and dangerous. Everyone was a little scared of her and a little drunk on her awesomeness.
I wanted to be her. I still do.
Sometimes I catch a glimpse of her, in my face. For one second, in the mirror. And I realize I want to be her more than I’ve ever wanted to be inarguably gorgeous. I want to be the woman who knows that she’s awesome. What is sexier than knowing that you’re awesome? I’m trying, and I really can’t think of anything.
(don’t worry. the dagger is purely decorative)
* * *
Un-roast: Today I love my hips.
Kate on March 1st 2011 in Uncategorized
Erin Block responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:30 am #
Un-roast: Today I love that a coworker just told me “You look hearty! Great! Happy! Like you’re enjoying food!”
I am…
Mandy responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:35 am #
The term “self-confidence” has been used so much that I kinda forgot what it really means–to know that you’re awesome. They should put that definition in the dictionary, it captures self-confidence in a nutshell!
And, Kate… You don’t need a dagger to be awesome. You’re already there.
Kellie responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:37 am #
I woke up as a story teller this morning.
Normally I feel like what my Mom use to say to me..
“You are too big for your britches,” or ” Get off your high horse”
I always thought she meant I thought I was better than her.
I don’t know.. but I do recall snubbing her periodically cause I couldn’t believe she didn’t have a clue about some things.
Now that I have teenagers, I kind of know what she was going through, but because of technology I feel almost as upto date on my kids as they are…. okay maybe not completely but I don’t feel as out dated as my Mom was.
I do feel superior a lot… does that make me bad? Because I don’t have ‘the bad habits’ drinking, smoking, drugs.. I do feel smarter. I feel smarter than the average bear a lot. All because I don’t drive without my seatbelt, I don’t smoke cigarettes or drink.. or if I do drink till I’m drop down drunk black out and can’t remember where I live or my name.
I sometimes feel like that ‘Super Woman’ until I go to leap that tall building and find I can’t even run fast enough or even run at all.. to jump it. I use to feel invincible.. but perhaps it was only because I was living with someone who constantly tried to break me… cause now that I don’t live that kind of person I find things hurt me more like my walls of in-destruction crumbled around me when I wasn’t looking..
Bring on that Strong Woman, let her breath.. even if it’s only for a few moments…after a shower.. perhaps you don’t really need her right now.. hopefully you won’t ever need her. Cause; in all fairness, all a girl really wants is to be loved, treated fairly and with respect and live her life without someone bringing her down or killing her dreams.
So every once in a while when you see the other ‘Women’ you want to be or experience… know they are there reminding you that if you need them… when you need them, they will step up to the plate and won’t let you down.
Un-roast: today I love my brain… and I fancy my eyes. 🙂
Live what you Love, Love what you Do. ♥
Kellie responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:41 am #
“or if I do drink till I’m drop down drunk black out and can’t remember where I live or my name.”
was supposed to read as:
of if I do, I don’t drink till I’m drop down drunk black out and can’t remember where I live or my name.;
LOL 🙂
Erin Block responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:41 am #
P.S. I love the dagger. You’re awesome!
Kate responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:51 am #
@Erin and Mandy
Thank you for not thinking I’m insane for posting a picture of myself with a dagger. I felt slightly insane when I hit “publish.” But now I feel better.
Lili responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 11:54 am #
Lemme help ya out ‘ere. “What is sexier than knowing that you’re awesome?” NOTHING! Whee! 🙂
Liz Nord responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 12:20 pm #
Kate, I LOVE this! I think we are all a little bit of all three characters depending on the situation. 🙂
Erinleigh responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 12:45 pm #
I always wanted to be a super woman. Today…I pretty much am. In my own little way…I am SUPER to myself for overcoming all of my past mistakes, for moving on from past abusive relationships, for the intellect I know I posess, and the drive and determination I have to be the best woman I can be. Regardless of anyone else’s opinion. I am strong. I am woman. Hear me roar! 🙂
Ashley responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 12:51 pm #
Your posts are awesome. Always such a fun read.
Liz Nord responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 12:51 pm #
@Erinleigh, I couldn’t have said it any better! LOVE LOVE LOVE!
B1 responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 1:18 pm #
Hmmm… yesterday you said you were going to use more pictures. LOL! But I love this post and I think I want to be the 3rd character too.
Kate responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 1:19 pm #
@B1
Yeah. That’ll be…tomorrow.
🙂
Really! I promise!
Katie responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 2:06 pm #
um, i LOVE this: “What is sexier than knowing that you’re awesome?” i want to write it on my mirror.
Mme Wong responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 3:27 pm #
Count me in for wanting to be the third character too. And it’s pretty much always been the same. I remember back in maybe first of second grade, I was one of the only girls who would go and play Star Wars with the boys. As it was bound to happen, the other few girls would fight over who would get to impersonate Princess Leia. I never did. I’d made up my very own Jedi alien queen character from the get go, and she was so much more awesome!
Unroast: I love how I’ve succeeded at revealing both my age and my geekiness in a few words.
Cary responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 3:49 pm #
Un-roast: Today I love that after I read your blog post, I looked in the mirror and for a moment your third character was staring back at me.
MWN responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 9:34 pm #
So true! Nothing is sexier than knowing you’re awesome.
Un-roast: I often know that I’m awesome. And when I forget, like this past week, I get help and spend hours rereading Fat Acceptance blogs (like Shapely Prose’s kateharding.net) and remind myself what’s important. It’s hard to reject society’s messages but someone’s got to do it.
Kate responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 9:40 pm #
@Cary
Hey, that’s really sweet!
Kate responded on 01 Mar 2011 at 9:40 pm #
@MWN
Well said! Someone’s got to do it. Can I steal that idea and write a post about it?
Carly Findlay responded on 02 Mar 2011 at 1:02 am #
When I was younger I wanted to be like everyone else, I just wanted to fit in.
Now I am happy I am not like everyone else. I am glad I am me.
And I would rather my personality and attitude over good looks any day.
Thanks for the post.
Wei-Wei responded on 02 Mar 2011 at 1:15 am #
Actually in my mind that last character is always stunningly gorgeous and unintentionally feminine, while being badass and super strong and confidently masculine.
It’s strange.
Suzanne responded on 05 Mar 2011 at 9:05 pm #
Holy Guacamole!! I dream every single solitary day that I might get to be that warrior woman. Sometimes it bubbles up for a brief moment and I feel the strong power of its pull. But mostly I just don’t get there. I am convinced warrior woman is in there. She is a wolf, a demon, an emperor, a pharoah. She is fearless and doesn’t let anything stand in her way. She never feels she is unworthy. She knows her own strength and power and these things determine who she is and she never forgets it. Or lets anyone else forget either. she doesn’t need the earthly things; pretty, thin, accepted; She simply is. thank you for a great post that helps unleash my inner warrior woman. i can see her in the distance again. 🙂